More From 2007 - This One's A Hoot

I'm sure I've been this tired before, but I can't recall when. Sometime after a forced, 100 mile march or something.

 

It's very difficult sitting down and preparing to write all Bohemian like when every muscle in the body is screaming "Sleep, you freakin' moron, get some sleep!!"

 

The thing is, I can't sleep. I've tried, but I just lay awake staring into space, thinking about...nothing really. Nothing I can put my finger on, anyway.

 

I tried eating, as food usually does the trick for me, but that hasn't really helped. Now I'm just full of pasta and can't sleep.

 

I sometimes wonder about all those lost hours I've spent not being able to sleep, and not being able to actually be productive. What if I could reclaim those hours and put them to use? Maybe I could write a great novel with those hours, or at least clean out the garage. Smart money is on cleaning out the garage.

 

 HERE'S TONITE'S TOP TEN LIST


Top Ten Ways I Could Use Those Lost Hours Of Productivity That Were Spent Staring At The Ceiling:




NUMBER TEN Help Billy Ray Cyrus compose comeback single.


NUMBER NINE Build paper-mache replicas of Mo & KC


NUMBER EIGHT Finish going through all my junk I'm planning on throwing out, and actually throwing it out.


NUMBER SEVEN Weed through my wardrobe.


NUMBER SIX Write amusing short stories that I could sell for big bucks to the New Yorker magazine.


NUMBER FIVE Finishing the drywall in the lower level


NUMBER FOUR Figuring out what the big cat is chewing on


NUMBER THREE Vacuuming


NUMBER TWO Writing letters of complaint to the Lakewood City Council about the screwed up No Parking signs in this town.


And The Number One Way I Could Use Those Lost Hours Of Productivity That Were Spent Staring At The Ceiling: Texture and paint the damn ceiling (It really needs it)

Man, I'm hungry again. And I really need to sleep. Maybe cheese is the answer...of course it is! Cheese is always the answer!